Monday Monologue 07.30.12

Posted on Posted in Michigan Football

War is heating up in the Big Ten Conference. And two schools are clearly differentiating themselves from the competition. Michigan and that school in Ohio are clearly setting the pace, and you could even call it the “Big 2, Little 10”. I’m not talking about football standings or even recruiting. I’m talking about player arrests.

Historically, only MSU can keep up with the big boys in that category (Credit goes to @jfish6711 for both of those).

The Cleveland Browns were sold for one billion dollars. Moving on to the next line, because sometimes the jokes write themselves.

The Big House Report may be looking to get bought out by NBC Sports. If that happens, expect them to use the same tape delay feature on this article as they use for the Olympics. Which means you should start seeing the #ThingsSofterThanSullinger top ten list in a few weeks.

Speaking of the list, the Top Ten is now called the Big Ten, and is 20% bigger! We had to change it because Letterman’s lawyers were all up on my grill. That last sentence isn’t true at all.
Continuing the World’s Shortest Book series this week. As always, twitter contributors get credit.

Here are the Big Ten Shortest Buckeye Books:

12. “Beating Michigan” by John Cooper (@jebbe1977)
11. “How to Get Luck to go your Way” by Greg Oden (@LanceGordon)
10. “Crushing My Inner Demons” by Art Schlichter (@Honcho33)
9. “Dominating the SEC” (@CD_Tink)
8. “How to Beat Purdue in Their House” (@LanceGordon)
7. “The Winners Manual: For The Game of Life.” by Jim Tressel … Wait that book is real. Nevermind. (@Mark_Blosser)
6. “Family Ties” by Urban Meyer (@jebbe1977)
5. “How to Leave Early for the NFL”  by Maurice Clarett (@SteveCKays)
4. “Microsoft Outlook Email for Dummies”  by Jim Tressel (@LanceGordon)
3. “How To Cooperate With The NCAA” by Gordon Gee and Gene Smith (@SteveCKays)
2. “The 2012-2013 Buckeye Bowl Game Official Program” (@LanceGordon)
1. “What’s a Guy Gotta Do To Get Fired Around Here?” by Gene Smith (@Mark_Blosser)

Please follow me on Twitter @LanceGordon

Derek Devine
Institutional voice of Alma College during the day, Michigan fanatic at night. Taking TBHR to the next level one post at a time.

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