Monday Monolgue: 04.02.12

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Lance is a diehard Michigan fan based deep in enemy territory (Columbus, Ohio). You can follow him on Twitter @LanceGordon. Look for his “Monday Monologue” series every Monday right here at The Big House Report!

Monday Monologue 04.02.12

A lane violation was a crucial play in that school in Ohio’s loss to
Kansas on Saturday night. When the school’s AD Gene Smith heard that
Aaron Craft violated the rules, he said “Aaron Craft will make a fine
athletic director someday.”

The Buckeyes last won the NCAA basketball title in 1960. In an official statement, the school does not want you go call this a 52 year title drought. It shall be referred to as THE 52 year title drought.

How soft is Jared Sullinger? Pretty soft. In fact, here are the Top 10 #ThingsTougherThanSullinger, out of more than 100 entries (!!!) on Twitter, contributors names in parentheses:

10. Joel Zumaya’s Elbow (@jjthomas06)
9. “smart” Cars (@TheDarcyPorter)
8. Qualifying academically for football at TSiO (@LanceGordon)
7. Freshly Spun Cotton Candy (@LanceGordon)
6. The London Silly Nannies (@BryanLake10) (Family Guy Reference)
5. Mark Dantonio’s Discipline Policy (@LanceGordon)
4. TSiO’s non-conference football schedule (@UMJason)
3. The Crying OSU Girl (@louisgoblue) (see pic above)
2. Greg Oden’s Knees (@jcvanmeter)
1. Greg Robinson’s Defense (@LanceGordon)

Thanks to everyone for contributing, and yes I’m obviously biased toward my own entries, but if you don’t like it, start your own column.

MSU’s athletic director Mark Hollis made headlines this week by directly tweeting Michigan freshman PG sensation Trey Burke with advice about whether he should go pro, while using improper grammar. To recap: committed NCAA violation, more worried about Michigan than his own school, improper grammar. Is that the Sparty-est thing ever?

Speaking of “Is that the most (_______) thing ever”, the Buckeyes lost the game Saturday when they were too busy arguing with the refs to pay attention to what was going on during what turned out to be the final 2.9 seconds of the game. That is THE most Buckeye thing ever. (H/T to Northwestern blogger @Loretta8_SoP for pointing that out)

Derek Devine
Institutional voice of Alma College during the day, Michigan fanatic at night. Taking TBHR to the next level one post at a time.